You know, I wasn't going to write one of these this year. I wrote an inspirational post last year on how 2020 was going to be the best one yet! And...well, yeah. But here I am sitting in my (now lukewarm) bathtub having written one anyway because someone inspired me.
Last night was NYE and of course I had a little cold that’s been bothering me for a few days, so my husband and I stayed in rather than going to a small gathering at a friend’s who is moving away soon. But dammit, I wasn’t going to let the year end on me like that. So without hesitation I showered, grabbed a full on evening gown from my closet, pantyhose, eyeliner, the full enchilada, and proceeded to get all dressed up, not caring I had nowhere to go and felt pretty awful. Cheap champagne was popped early, pictures with my dog were snapped, and text chats with family were had, followed by tequila shots at midnight on a Zoom call with those friends at the party. Despite the setback, it was a great night, but only because I was determined to make it so!
Woke up NYE day and got on Insta to instantly regret tipsily having posted *several* selfies; that’s not generally my style. I wanted to delete them but I thought to myself…you know what, there’s a reason I posted these…I wanted to remember what pretty felt like, what a good time looks like, with a smile on my face. There are too many days where I don’t remember those things and one of the reasons I love pictures is that they remind you of the beauty in this world. A ray of hope and sunshine to look back on in the dark times. So I cringed and left them up, even the slightly racy one (thankfully my account is private, ha).
Then the best part happened, whilst enjoying my then hot bath. My Mom text me that my Aunt, who is in her seventies and lives alone after her husband of fifty years passed away a while back, told her that my dolled up pictures from the night before inspired her to feel fancy and put on makeup today, “even lipstick.” My heart melted. Yes! That is the point – let’s inspire each other to live this life, even when conditions are not perfect or you’re sick or sad. We only get one shot at this thing. I’ve spent too many days feeling scared, ashamed, sad, anxious…and those days aren’t over, but I’m tired of succumbing to them so often. My goal is to be done with that mindset and embrace whatever comes my way with grace and perseverance.
This isn’t a resolution - it’s a continued push for a change in perspective I’ve been trying to work towards for years, a different way of life.
“Get busy living, or get busy dying.” – Andy Dufresne and "Red" Redding
P.S. I'll probably want to delete this post five minutes after hitting publish, but...I won't in case it inspires someone to put on their version of lipstick.